roadtrip confessions
November 25, 2008 6:00 am UncategorizedBlogfriends, tonight I am leaving the Bluegrass State for the frozen tundra of Pennsylvania. It’s not nearly as interesting as absconding to the Riviera, but you take what you can get. Since I’m fairly certain I won’t be able to update while we’re on the road — I tend to sleep through the boring parts, aka Ohio and most of the Keystone State — I offer you these early-morning morsels of potentially embarrassing facts about yours truly:
* When I first heard Michael Jackson’s “Man in the Mirror,” I couldn’t understand what it was about. Why would there be a man in the mirror? And why in the world would Michael Jackson be singing to him? Did he look in the mirror and see someone else there? Why wasn’t he creeped out? Wikipedia tells me it was released in 1988, so there — my excuse is that I was seven years old and apparently incredibly dense.
* I used to think “fl. oz.” on a bottle of soda meant “floral ounces” instead of “fluid ounces.” Don’t ask me why. My mother nearly collapsed from laughing when she found out.
* I never made it past level one of gymnastics. I failed most unceremoniously when it became apparent I couldn’t do a chin-up pullover on the uneven bars. I will remember the name of that stupid move until the day I die.
* When I was small, I used to wake up in the middle of the night and be halfway through getting ready for school before I realized it was still dark outside.
* I love to grocery shop. I can spend hours in Kroger, inspecting produce and debating the merits of ground turkey versus ground chicken.
* TV shows on my DVR include America’s Next Top Model, The Amazing Race, The Big Bang Theory, Two and a Half Men, and How I Met Your Mother. I’ve also been known to watch The Next Food Network Star, reruns of Fresh Prince and the Golden Girls, and The Lawrence Welk Show (hush up, it reminds me of my grandmother).
* I know the words to the Pennsylvania Polka.
* I routinely forget how to do the most mundane things. One morning earlier this month, I twirled the spigot that turns the shower on (as opposed to the one that turns the water on), and couldn’t figure out why nothing was coming out. I was halfway to the phone to call apartment maintenance when it dawned on me.
Now spill!
The Husband :
Date: November 25, 2008 @ 8:52 am
I still randomly find myself thinking of a fork as a “dinglehopper.”
This one isn’t quite so potentially embarrassing for me considering that I know some people won’t need to Google it.
courtney :
Date: November 25, 2008 @ 11:12 am
You know the words to the Pennsylvania Polka? I am impressed!
I used to think the song “Brilliant Disguise” by Bruce Springsteen was “Brillo In Disguise.” Because undercover scrubbing pads make sense.
monica :
Date: November 25, 2008 @ 12:37 pm
when no one else is home, which , now with the boy is never, i have smoked oysters and beer for dinner.
and also once when i went to answer my cell phone in mixed company, there was a feminine hygeine product stuck to it, oh wait that wasnt me, that was….